Inhale

“Brothers and sisters:
If there is any encouragement in Christ,
any solace in love,
any participation in the Spirit,
any compassion and mercy,
complete my joy by being of the same mind, with the same love,
united in heart, thinking one thing.
Do nothing out of selfishness or out of vainglory;
rather, humbly regard others as more important than yourselves,
each looking out not for his own interests,
but also everyone for those of others.” -Philippians 2:1-4

I’ve been doing a study on the four female Doctors of the Church with a couple friends, and it has been wrecking me. Last week, we reflected on St. Hildegard of Bingen. She was a pharmacist, mystic, abbess, poet, theologian, and composer (so she was basically amazing at everything), and she wrote several books and over 300 letters.

St. Hildegard often struggled with self-doubt, but as she grew in allowing herself to receive Christ’s love into the deepest depths of her being, her voice was freed and the doors of her heart flew open to letting the Holy Spirit work through her in powerful ways.

Today’s first reading from St. Paul’s letter to the Philippians talks about participating in the Spirit. A few years ago, a friend of mine asked: “What would happen if we prayed for the same response to the outpouring of the Holy Spirit that the Apostles had at Pentecost?” My initial reaction was one of fear. “What kind of crazy things would God call me to?” I thought. How often fear prevents us from saying yes to the greatness the Holy Spirit wills to do in and through us.

This one mind, heart, love, and thinking that St. Paul is talking about is all wrapped up and rooted in the Holy Spirit. He is our healer, comfort, strength, and guide. We all have the awesome opportunity and responsibility to allow the Holy Spirit to bring life and transformation to others through our words and actions. Let’s not squander that gift.

Will we have the courage to respond? In order to lead others to Christ, we must first look inward and do a heart-check on ourselves. Last week at a retreat for my youth ministry teens, the speaker said, “God wants to breathe new life into us, but we have to inhale.” And not only that, but once we let the Holy Spirit fill our beings, we have to exhale His fruits for others, and never stop breathing in.

What gifts has God given you that the Holy Spirit is calling you to use? What is one way you can be obedient to the Holy Spirit and exercise those gifts today? It may be as simple as texting a friend that God puts on your heart to let them know you’re thinking of them. It may be having the courage to have a difficult yet needed conversation. Maybe God is calling you to serve Him in a new way.

God has given each of us a light that no one else in the world will ever be able to give. You are an integral part of building up God’s Kingdom, whether you feel like it or not. Do not give into the temptation that someone else will do it, that you are not good enough, or that He may ask too much of you. Why are we often so afraid to shine?

“We cannot live in a world that is interpreted for us by others. An interpreted world is not a hope. Part of the terror is to take back our own listening. To use our own voice. To see our own light.” -St. Hildegard of Bingen

Originally posted on Frassati Reflections on November 5th, 2018

Be Found

“Jesus was teaching in a synagogue on the sabbath.
And a woman was there who for eighteen years
had been crippled by a spirit;
she was bent over, completely incapable of standing erect.
When Jesus saw her, he called to her and said,
“Woman, you are set free of your infirmity.”
He laid his hands on her,
and she at once stood up straight and glorified God.” (Luke 13:10-13)

Eighteen years. Whoa. Can you imagine her suffering? The demon had caused her such pain and grief that her whole body was crippled under the weight of it all. She couldn’t even stand up properly.

There is so much we can learn from this woman.

First of all, she was in the right place. She was in the synagogue, the Lord’s house. She was praying. The woman turned to God for healing. We don’t know her full story, but I would imagine it would’ve been tempting for her to have given up long ago. She could have become bitter and angry. She could’ve let what other people were saying about her and thinking of her eat away at her heart: she could’ve believed the lies that she was worthless, hopeless, not wanted, unwelcomed, inadequate. Yet she showed up in God’s presence. She put herself in a position to be found. She prayed. She let herself be vulnerable before the Lord, coming before Him as she was, brokenness and all.

She allowed Jesus to heal her. Do we allow Jesus to heal us?

Then, when Jesus cast the demon out of her, she immediately glorified God! She gave Him all the glory for His goodness and faithfulness. She was unafraid and unashamed to praise God for her healing, even though the synagogue leader and the crowd were furious with Jesus for healing her on the sabbath.

Jesus heals the woman with compassionate, tender care. He sees her. He knowsher. He calls her “woman,” intimately acknowledging her dignity as God’s daughter when she probably didn’t feel very confident in her womanhood. He lays hands on her, an act not just of healing but a physical sign of His love. He knew that she needed to know she was deeply wanted, seen, and beautiful. He doesn’t define her by her suffering, but by who she is in Him.

God made us, body and soul. Sometimes when our souls are sick and hurting, our bodies can become physically ill, as with the crippled woman. While you may not have suffered from something for eighteen years, we all have things that cripple us. Maybe you’re going through a particularly difficult season of life right now that leaves you feeling like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. What is crippling you? Does a situation in your life right now seem hopeless? Has your heart been hurting for a long time, so long that it feels like the darkness won’t end? Whether it’s sin or a wound or both, bring that to Jesus today. Do not be afraid to step into His presence and reveal your whole heart to Him. He sees you. He knows you. Ask Him to heal you. He surely will, in His perfect timing and goodness. He so desires your healing. Sometimes we have to take the courageous step to lay it all bare before Him and let Him in. Put yourself in a position to be found. God is faithful.

Originally posted on Frassati Reflections on October 29th, 2018

Deemed Worthy

“But God, who is rich in mercy,
because of the great love he had for us,
even when we were dead in our transgressions,
brought us to life with Christ (by grace you have been saved),
raised us up with him,
and seated us with him in the heavens in Christ Jesus,
that in the ages to come
he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace
in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus.” (Ephesians 2:4-7)

How unworthy we are to receive this gift, the gift of God’s mercy. God chooses us anyway, and He never stops choosing us. In the midst of our sin, He is already working to bring us back to life with Christ.

I’ve often thought, “Why does God love us so much? Why does He do things that are seemingly irrational in human terms?” We run far, far away—He chases us down and relentlessly pursues us, leaving the 99. We hide in our shame and sin—He comes to rescue us and is the Light that shatters all darkness. God sent His only Son to die for us in the most brutal and physically, emotionally, and spiritually horrifying way. He didn’t have to. He could’ve left us alone in the misery of our sin, saying, “Well, I gave you a chance…” But no. He is always after our hearts, no matter how far we try to shove Him away and no matter how steeped in sin we become. There is no extent to which He won’t go to rescue you.

Why does God forgive us over and over again? Why does He forgive so easily? Well, we can look to today’s Psalm for a simple yet profound answer: “The Lord made us, we belong to Him.” We are God’s beloved sons and daughters. Of course He wouldn’t want to lose us. Of course He would chase after us and do everything He could to give us His grace, hoping that we will ask for mercy and accept His love.

We are unworthy, yet He deems us worthy.

When I was 16, I got into a pretty scary car accident. I was driving down a street in my neighborhood a few blocks from my house, and someone pulled out from a stop sign and hit me. Thankfully, the other driver and I were not seriously hurt. When I called my parents to tell them what had happened, they came running down the street to find me and hugged me tightly. Even though the accident was not my fault, I was afraid they would be upset with me for what happened. Instead, the first words out of their mouths were, “Are you okay?” They spoke with the utmost love and concern. They didn’t care about the car, they just wanted to make sure I was alive and safe.

Brothers and sisters, this is God’s question to us when we fall into sin: “Are you okay? Is My son okay? Is My daughter okay?” How blessed we are that our God is slow to anger and quick to love and forgive. When we ask for His mercy, He is so eager to give it to us. He wants us to be okay.

God doesn’t want to lose us. He doesn’t want His family to stray away and suffer the consequences of sin. Let Him pursue after your heart. Run to Him in the Sacrament of Confession. Don’t delay. Allow Him to give you the immeasurable riches of His grace. We are created for greatness: what steps do you need to take to live that more fully?

“We are not the sum of our weaknesses and failures; we are the sum of the Father’s love for us and our real capacity to become the image of his Son.” (St. John Paul II, whose feast is today!)

Originally posted on Frassati Reflections on October 22nd, 2018

Let Nothing Disturb You

Blessed be the name of the Lord forever.
Praise, you servants of the LORD,
praise the name of the LORD.
Blessed be the name of the LORD
both now and forever (Psalm 113:1-2)

God, we praise You.

You alone are worthy of our praise.

We praise You in times of great consolation.

We praise You when we feel suffocated by fear.

We praise You, even when our hearts are aching and destruction is all around us.

We praise You when it is hard to trust.

You are good.

You have not forsaken us.

From the rising to the setting of the sun
is the name of the LORD to be praised.
High above all nations is the LORD;
above the heavens is his glory (Psalm 113:3-4)

When we wake up well-rested, we praise You.

When a new day starts after a sleepless night, we praise You for life.

When we are feeling confident on the way out the door, we praise You for that grace.

In the moments where we feel like we can barely make it through, we praise You.

When we share a meal with friends, we praise You.

When we are so busy we scarf down a quick bite on the subway, we praise You.

When we mess up and say or do something we regret, we praise You for Your awaiting mercy.

When we receive great news, we praise You knowing that all good things come from You.

When work is stressful, we praise You.

When familial relationships are strained, we praise You for never abandoning us.

When we lose someone we love, we praise You for Your resurrection.

When we’re so tired we can barely muster the words to pray, we praise You for the breath You put in our lungs.

When we are up late writing that paper or meeting that deadline, we praise You for how You provide.

When we lie awake in bed worrying about finances or family, we praise You for the way You made our hearts to love.

When we are awake at 4am caring for our crying children, we praise You for the gift they are to us.

You are sovereign over all.

You are faithful through it all.

Who is like the LORD, our God,
who looks upon the heavens and the earth below?
He raises up the lowly from the dust;
from the dunghill he lifts up the poor (Psalm 113:5-7)

Lord, You meet us in our darkness.

You are there when our hearts ache of loneliness.

You are there when we feel unloved.

You are there when we are embarrassed or ashamed.

You are there when You seem far away.

You are there when we can’t help but cry.

You are there when we struggle in our faith.

You are there when we shut You out with distractions, sin, or fear.

You are there in seasons of change.

You are there in our mourning.

You are there. You are enough for me, Lord.

I praise You.

When was the last time you stopped and praised the Lord? What if every part of our day became a song of praise for our Lord, even the trying moments? His goodness never changes. Today we celebrate the Feast of St. Teresa of Avila. She, like our patron Bl. Frassati, like the seven new saints canonized yesterday, had one thing in common: everything they did was about the Lord. He was enough for them. And no matter what hardships they faced, they kept their eyes fixed on Jesus and praised Him in the good and the storms. God is so worthy of our praise, dear friends! Be encouraged today knowing that He is with you.

“Let nothing disturb you,
Let nothing frighten you,
All things are passing away:
God never changes.
Patience obtains all things
Whoever has God lacks nothing;
God alone suffices.”
— St. Teresa of Avila

P.S. This song taught me a lot about praising God in all things!

Originally posted on Frassati Reflections on October 15th, 2018

Our Worth is in Him Alone

“Am I now currying favor with human beings or God?
Or am I seeking to please people?
If I were still trying to please people,
I would not be a slave of Christ” (Galatians 1:10).

This verse from St. Paul’s letter to the Galatians stopped me in my tracks as I went through the readings for today. I wish I could say I only ever seek affirmation from God, but it’s a point of struggle for me. I am a people-pleaser, and sometimes I fall into the temptation to worry too much about what other people think of me. Thoughts of inadequacy, comparison, and isolation can plague us. How many of us wonder, “Am I good enough?”, “Do I have what it takes?”, “Can I do this?”, “What’s wrong with me?” Or we jump straight to the self-hatred: “I can’t do this,” “I’m not capable,” “I’m not good enough,” “I’m a burden,” “He/She is so much better than I am,” “I’m a mess.”

It is tempting to measure our worth by “standards” of appearance, friend circles, vocational status, career advancements, having that perfect Catholic Instagram photo with a Bible and coffee, feedback from a boss, or the people that seem to have it all together (they don’t). This will only make our aching hearts sick, and the whispered lies about our identity from the evil one will become the deafening norm. It all ultimately boils down to pride and not trusting in God enough—not trusting fully in how much He loves us.

The more we know our belovedness as God’s sons and daughters, the easier it is to let go and live totally for Him. When we dive into God’s heart, we find love and mercy itself. We find that He is always working for the good of those who love Him (Romans 8:28). We find that He has never abandoned us and never will (Matthew 28:20). We find solace, protection, safety, and peace (Psalm 91, John 14:27). We find the One who calls us His (John 10:14). We find forgiveness (1 John 1:9). We find the One who gives us everything just because we belong to Him (2 Peter 1:3). Faced with this reality, it can become easier and easier to totally trust our Lord. Like St. Paul said, “On this account I am suffering these things; but I am not ashamed, for I know Him in whom I have believed” (2 Timothy 1:12). God is trustworthy. Even with our darkest sins and secret shame, He is trustworthy; especially in that, He is trustworthy.

What things are holding you back from relying fully on God? Maybe it’s fear, suffering, shame, or lies on your heart about your identity. Maybe it’s a sin you keep falling into. Maybe it’s an addiction. Maybe it’s someone who hurt you deeply that you’re struggling to forgive. We all have stuff. Whatever it is, let’s start entrusting these things to the Sacred Heart of Jesus today. You are not alone.

A few years ago, I was a counselor for a Catholic camp for teens called Camp Veritas. One thing that is often heard yelled back and forth as the anthem of the camp is:

“What’s the objective of your life?”

“HEAVEN!”

“And if it’s not?”

“We’re wasting our time!”

Amen, amen. Let’s live this way—really live this way, seeking after Heaven rather than the approval of others.

Our worth lies in God alone. His opinion of you is all that matters. And He’s crazy about you. He will never forsake you.

Originally posted on Frassati Reflections on October 8th, 2018

Small Things, Great Love

“An argument arose among the disciples
about which of them was the greatest.
Jesus realized the intention of their hearts and took a child
and placed it by his side and said to them,
“Whoever receives this child in my name receives me,
and whoever receives me receives the one who sent me.
For the one who is least among all of you
is the one who is the greatest.”  (Luke 9:46-48)

Confession: I’m one of those people who is prone to getting easily distracted by cute little kids during Mass. Who doesn’t love adorable children, right? But there was one particular Sunday that a little boy displayed profound wisdom. I was kneeling in my pew after receiving the Eucharist. A worn-out looking mom moved forward in the aisle beside me to receive, holding her wriggly son who looked about two years old. As the priest said, “The Body of Christ,” the boy pointed to the Eucharist and said, “Jesus!”

I immediately smiled, and tears sprang to my eyes. “Jesus!” The little boy said it so matter-of-factly, the same as if he were to point to a picture of an apple and say, “apple!”

How quick are we to recognize Jesus around us? Can we, like the little boy, recognize the graces and goodness in our lives and immediately say, “Jesus,” knowing that He is the source? God is always up to more than we can see, and we are constantly surrounded by His goodness, mercy, protection, and attentive care. Are we also living in such a way that others could see the joy and love of the Lord in us and say, “Jesus”?

Today is the feast of one of my favorite saints and one of the doctors of our Church, St. Therese of Lisieux. St. Therese truly exemplified the childlike faith Jesus refers to in today’s Gospel. She freely gave Him everything, saying she “didn’t want to be a saint by halves.” She wrote of being a “little flower,” humble before the Lord:

“[Jesus] opened the book of nature before me, and I saw that every flower He has created has a beauty of its own; that the splendor of the rose and the lily’s whiteness do not deprive the violet of its scent, nor make less ravishing the daisy’s charm…So it is in the world of souls, the living garden of the Lord….He has also created little ones, who must be content to be daisies or violets nestling at His feet to delight His eyes when He should choose to look at them. The happier they are to be as He wills, the more perfect they are…What delights Him is the simplicity of these flowers of the field, and by stooping so low to them, He shows how infinitely great He is” (Story of a Soul, I).

Everything St. Therese did was intentionally rooted in love, even the small things. Her childlike faith was the fruit of selflessness and complete surrender to God. God can work wonders through what we may see as simple or even insignificant acts of love. May we be childlike before Him—quick to run to His arms with confidence, quick to love, quick to acknowledge His grace. Today let us be attune to all the ways Jesus is present in our day, giving Him praise by declaring His name over all the graces He gives us. And let’s do the same for others—loving greatly in small things.

Originally posted on Frassati Reflections on October 1st, 2018

Be Brave

“Jesus said to the crowd:
“No one who lights a lamp conceals it with a vessel
or sets it under a bed;
rather, he places it on a lampstand
so that those who enter may see the light.
For there is nothing hidden that will not become visible,
and nothing secret that will not be known and come to light” (Luke 8:16-18).

A constant theme of my prayer these last few weeks has been to not be discouraged. The weight of the darkness in our Church, our world, and some things for me personally sure has been heavy, sometimes seemingly too much to bear. Today’s Gospel is comforting in that all will be revealed by God. God sees. God knows. He has not abandoned us, nor will He ever. His truth reigns. God is always working for our good. Stop and let that sink in for a moment. Do you actually believe that? Do you trust God in that with all of your heart? I know I struggle sometimes to live in that truth. Some days, out of fear, I keep God at an arm’s length rather than fully letting Him in.

To the weary of heart, He sees you. He sees the efforts you are making for His Kingdom. We can trust that Jesus is who He says He is, and we are who He says we are, as well—God’s sons and daughters who have authority in His name.

We must be unafraid to be the lights on the lampstand, as tempting as it may be to hide right now. Sometimes we may think, “This is too hard, painful, difficult…” or, “I’m not good enough…” or, “I can’t make a difference…” but those are just lies! While hard, painful, and difficult do not begin to describe the excruciating tumult that is rocking our Church, and whatever personal crosses we bear, we are still a resurrection people. And God will not let our story end with pain and betrayal. What would happen if we were brave in letting God work through us? What if we dared to be attentive to the promptings of the Holy Spirit in the everyday? What would happen if we radically love like Christ in everything we do? What is He calling you to?

Today’s first reading from Proverbs says, “Say not to your neighbor, ‘Go, and come again, tomorrow I will give,’ when you can give at once.” How we are needed to rise up, without fear or shame, and without delay, to authentically love one another! I have been convicted now more than ever to be a joyful witness of Christ’s love—knowing that Christ’s love takes on many forms: suffering, healing, forgiveness, boldly proclaiming truth, walking with, mourning with, and even a simple gaze of compassion. All can be an offering of love for Him; we can strive to have all we do worship our Lord. Let us go out and be vessels of hope, continually pointing others towards Christ.

Originally posted on Frassati Reflections on September 24th, 2018